Inspiration from Disney
This weekend my family all sat down to watch the premier of Disney’s Descendants. Take away the typical Hollywood “fluff” and you are left with an encouraging message. The message is you don’t have to follow the path chosen by your parents. You can choose your own. Although it was geared towards children, we, as women, can take something from it.
Ideas of womanhood have been passed down to us by our parents, family and society. As we grow into our own we hear these many voices in our minds dictating what we should do. We follow it almost zombie like asking very few questions. The older we get the more lost we feel. We are unable to put into words why we fill unfulfilled and stuck. When we begin to consider changing our life we feel guilty. The good news is that it’s never too late to live according to your authentic essence.
Choosing for Yourself
Why can’t we have it all? Why can’t we be the woman we always dreamed of being? This is both a rhetorical question and a question needing an answer. The answer is: We are trapped in our own thinking. Ask yourself: What is my definition of a woman? Was it a definition passed down to me? Do I truly believe in this definition? Am I happy with the woman I’ve chosen to be? What steps can I take to be the woman I want to be?
Answer these questions honestly. The first step to change is acknowledgment. You can choose to create your own path and stop following the path passed down and/or forced upon you.
***The Take Away***
You are in control of creating your own life’s path. In order to do this you must conduct an internal inquiry. Only through acknowledgement can you begin living your authentic life.
Fear causes us to settle for mediocrity. It holds us back from truly being and doing what we were called to do. It makes excuses for why we are where we are in life. When operating in fear we may feel comfortable but never fulfilled. Fear lies to us and tells us we can’t accomplish what we desire. In my experience fear stands for False Evidence Appearing Real.
I have learned that there is no escaping your calling. Your calling will scream and bug you for the rest of your life and if you are not willing to hear her you will suffer. You will not like whom you’ve become. Think about it. Birds were called to fly. If for some odd reason a bird refuses to fly because of fear, how do you think his quality of life will be? The mother nips fear in the butt by nudging her baby out of the nest to fly. The hatchling can flap her wings or fall in defeat.
As mentioned earlier, fear is False Evidence Appearing to be Real. So, if fear is saying you are incapable, the opposite is true. You must change the way you view yourself by first changing your thoughts. A technique I have found helpful is speaking affirmations. An affirmation is a positive phrase that, when spoken long enough, will help you think more positively. Think about it. You believe a lie that you have replayed repeatedly in your mind possibly your whole life.
Here are some examples of affirmations you can recite throughout the day and when you feel fear:
“I am an effective and capable _________ (fill in the blank)”
“I can and will accomplish ___________”
“I have what I need within me.”
“Fear will not succeed.”
Don’t like mine? Make your own! It’s easy to do and like I said, completely an individual endeavor.
Your calling is unique and can only be discovered by you. You must dig deep and pull this calling out of you. You cannot let others dictate your calling, although others may have some valuable insight. As children we are born with a clean slate. It is our parents and society that places ideas and morals within us. We are downloaded with everyone’s insight and view of life. We are also downloaded with their fears and insecurities. It is our job to sift through all of this information and discover who we are and what we were called to do.
***The take away***
There’s no escaping your calling. If you try, your quality of life will suffer. Only you can find your true calling but you must be willing to let go of fear and fly.
For all who played sports. This is for you:
Happy Birthday to me!
So yesterday I celebrated my 29th birthday. This year I’ve learned one thing and that is the importance of taking care of myself. In taking care of myself I was able to see how much I value my family and how much I can enjoy life with what I have. When I was younger I seen birthdays as a way to get whatever I wanted. Nothing has changed. What has changed is what I want. In the past I wanted material things. Now I want a peace of mind. They say getting older means getting wiser. I think this is because getting older means being placed in more situations that test your character. Time challenges your beliefs and morals. Time makes you question who you are. I am thankful for the time I have spent on earth so far. If there is one birthday wish I have for myself and for others is to grow in understanding and wisdom. Change should be embraced because change means growth.
*The take Away: True happiness comes not by what you have but who you are. Seek wisdom and understanding as this will help you grow.